Fear/Break Loose/

MY NEW LIFE MOTTO: I am NOT a victim.

Let me first say this: Life happens. I know life can hurt. I know that some things happen to people unfairly. But the ultimate truth is that….I don’t have to become a victim from it. “Being a victim” is an event, not a life status. There are a good portion of us that switch that, and “being a victim” is a LIFE SENTENCE. Regardless of what have happened in our lives, we are responsible for how we move forward and accountable for the choices we make thereafter. Now, I feel that we allow society, “the culture”, and even family tell us how we should act in accordance to certain events in our lives that opens the door to “victimhood”. We are told that we have to blame this group of people for our pain, or we have to feel sorry for ourselves in order to gain love, peace, and even respect from others. This is not to minimize anyone’s journey or past trauma, but I want to tear down the idea that “I cannot rise above because this or that happen to me.”

Stereotypes are “half-truths”. Yes, I am a 32-year old, Black American, single mother. With those three characteristics alone, stereotypes are attach. Some think millennials are over-ambitious and lazy, while others think black women are loud and ghetto. As a single mother that has only one child and doing well for myself, I am still not seen by everyone as an “upstanding citizen” due to the stigma that people with children outside of wedlock must be whores…(the nicest way I can put it). The reality of these statements is that some actually do play out in people’s lives. Yes, there are some millennials that feel like the world owe them something, and they won’t put the work in at all. Yes, there are single mothers that are terrible at parenting, and actually making it hard for their children’s fathers. Yes, there are issues within the Black community that has nothing to do with slavery or the “white man”, but due to some not wanting to take responsibility for their own lives. (Not trying to sound insensitive to my own community but tired of seeing my own people become paralyzed to “what someone else think about them”.)

“Half-truths” are still lies. No one is spared from the ups and downs of life, but we all have an equal opportunity to make the best out of our lives. I cannot depend on other people to make things happen for me. Yes, I am a single mother, but it does not stop me from pursuing my goals, and I do not have to sleep around with any and everybody in order to feel great about myself. Just because something unfortunate happens does not mean I have to live by that “one event”. I do not have to bow down to what the world thinks about me. I know I am woman, but I’m intelligent and business-minded. Yes my skin is brown, but I love the way I look and have accomplished things that my “skin color” did not hinder. You and I have a choice……either to believe the lies or live in the truth of who you really are…WONDERFUL, AUTHENTIC, SMART, WISE, OVERCOMER…

Let’s declare this statement on today, “I’m breaking free from the world’s definition of me”.

This post right here was hitting my heart, and hope you got something out of it. As always, feel free to share your thoughts or comments….this is an open space…(just be respectful at the same time 😉)…Good day victors!